#BookReview: Paranormal University: First Semester by Jace Mitchell and Michael Anderle 3/5 Stars

I kinda want to get nitpicky but I kinda don’t. Like when Zeus was mentioned in the beginning and asked if he was from another mythological era. Technically yes, but the better question would have been: isn’t he from a different mythos? The answer would still be yes, but give the precise answer the main character was looking for: Leprechauns are Irish and Zeus is Greek.

And way to gloss over 6 weeks of beginning a friendship. One second she was hunting down a guy who stole her purse, next a month and a half has gone by, a magical invasion has started and she’s having beer with the leprechaun…missed opportunities…just saying.

Timeline plot hole: cab driver says the invasion has been happening for a couple of years. Earlier it was implied that the invasion had only been happening for roughly 6 or 7 weeks.

Tangents. For a teacher that hates wasting time,  he sure loves tangents. And the class “The Veil and Invasion Theory,” will not explain the magical creatures. Just how they got to Earth.
Ok I’m getting nitpicky.

Another plot hole: teacher says there have only been two records of the Veil tearing. Earlier it was said on the news it was happening all over…more than twice and obviously more than 2 were documented.

Children are more likely to see the mythological creatures. I’m sorry, I just can’t get past that part. They are far more likely to believe in the impossible, than an 18-23 year old because of their wild imaginations. Do college students go on and on about the monster in their closet or the tooth fairy giving them money? No. By that age kids lose their imagination and are far more likely to come up with more logical answers as to why a short man appears to have green skin other than he is a leprechaun. Young kids will believe that on site, older ones will take more convincing.

These are turning into more of running commentary than a review. And I know I tend to overthink everything, but come on. A lot that I over think is something that helps the story along.

By chapter 10, I have a couple of questions. What have any of these mythological creatures done for the government to fear it is a war? So far the creatures that have been mentioned are harmless, or portrayed as such. There are myths out their about the veil that separates our world/realm/reality (whatever you want to call it) from others, but it seems like this world doesn’t have those; as they are currently studying and learning new things about it. How does that effect the rest of the creatures? How do they know that the mythos’ are true? They could be completely different from what the humans were taught, but then teaching those who are supposed to fight them, the human rules is setting them up to fail. Has the government caught a bunch of creatures for testing? If so how? I don’t think the FBI have a bunch of college students working for them. Or do they just rely on the footage taken by teenagers and somehow know they weren’t faked? What was the inciting incident that made the world believe the videos weren’t hoaxes? Things just aren’t making sense. When a majority of the population can’t see any of the creatures without digital (fallible) proof, how was it not just written off as those who can see (which we’re led to believe is a VERY small portion of people) are crazy?

In chapter 10, it is now implied that the world has been willed into existence by humans just believing in them. Brings me back to why people believe in easily faked proof that the creatures are real if most of the world no longer believes in their existence? How did the multitude of gods not die when they stopped being worshipped? I’m having flashbacks to Cool World and I’m not sure if I like it. (If you haven’t seen the movie, go watch it.)

The above brings more questions. If they were willed into existence, how do they know which mythos goes to which specific creature? The book brings up vampires and Dracula. Most vamps can be killed with just a stake to the heart. However there are vamps that need to be staked, and beheaded. Others need to be burned to ash and have the ashes spread around the world so they can’t regenerate. Some don’t burn in the sun, some need silver stakes instead of wooden ones. In a battle, like the kind they want us to believe is coming, you’re going to need to know which vamp is which so you don’t die in the process trying to kill them. I think they need to choose one iteration and stick with that, but then that would disprove the other reality being willed into existence and we’re back to how did this happen again.

Ok, you want the original Dracula…Vlad the Impaler was an actual person. Therefore can’t be willed into existence and can’t be summoned from an imaginary world…unless he went there when he died and became an actual vampire. Yep…I have issues.

Continuity error: school is in Boston. One of the agents complains about how cold it is in Boston. The other agent is asked if he is hot in just a suit. What season are we working with here?

Btw, how is the mc a leader? She hasn’t done anything to prove she’s anything but a student, as all training is glossed over. Not shown how Teams is loyal either. Would be nice to actually see these traits in action instead of teachers talking out of their asses.

Direct quote: “They’re going to die for her, if necessary.” That is the boldest and most unsubstantiated statement I think I have read in my life. She couldn’t even keep a steady friend for more than a page. She went to the amusement park with her best friend, six weeks later her best friend is a leprechaun. Only person who might die for her is her mom, she’s the only one that has shown any concern at all for the main character. And even that only lasted a couple of paragraphs as we don’t see the parents again, except for a quick mention of having talked to them a few times in the month she had been away.

If it’s not the cross, but the faith behind it…the holy water shouldn’t have worked. Added note after finishing: This is mentioned by Dracula at one point…reiterating why it shouldn’t have worked in the first place.

The farther I go, the more I just face palm and wonder why I keep going.

Dracula is not Endgame…please be Cthulu! Please! Cthulu is like the only creature that could save the story. Added note after finishing: As there are three more books, I’m still hoping for Cthulu!

Funny part: mc was told she’d be fighting with weapons that even the military doesn’t have and all she gets is stakes, garlic, and holy water. She’s right, most military can’t see what she’s fighting and has no use for those weapons, so of course they don’t have them! Mc doesn’t get it though. Added note after finishing: Yes she finally got what she was wanting, but I have issues that you’ll see farther down.

Anyone ever hear of wooden bullets? No? They may not kill (sometimes can) but could at least be helpful to slow them down…just me? Ok.

What the hell is an Asclepius staff and why haven’t we heard of them before? Teacher says like it like it happens on a regular basis. Added note after finishing: Still no clue as it was never mentioned again.

Playing by the set rules of the book, the witching hour should be midnight. It has been believed to be the hour of witches and demons far longer by the majority of the population than 3 o’clock. It wasn’t until I was a freshman that I learned the true witching hour was three, because that is the time a normal person with a normal sleep schedule is closest to death. There was also something with Jesus being crucified at 3 PM and the 3 AM was supposed to be making a mockery of that as its direct opposite, but I’m not too sure if I remember that part right.

Yes, let’s announce our plan in front of the vampires. Best idea ever! Heavy on the sarcasm…

All he has seen of the world is the room he had been summoned to. How does he know he couldn’t get around by himself? If he is the Dracula they are looking for, he could find anybody on the planet to do his bidding. Read their minds to understand everything and be done with them.

When Remington got a glass of beer for Lance and said the kids were too young, would have been funnier if Jack had tried for a glass or asked for one. Kind of just blah him and snobbish him handing the glass and then saying sorry.

If Frank is as short as he is to be believed, when Claire nudges him with her elbow she either misses or hits him in the head. Neither work well for the other. Added bonus: Drinking on the job is a no-no, as by-the-book as the FBI boys are, they wouldn’t drink on the job.

Lance is getting on my nerves. He says other things, but 95% or more (and I lean heavily toward the more) is “Told you.”

Fireball is cool. If metal stakes work, why not ditch the wooden ones?

Arm is almost healed? Humans have super healing now?

1. The weapons are most likely prototypes given the short amount of time they were produced in, so shouldn’t be many and prone to breaking/failing. 2. Because they are prototypes and likely to fail at some point, conservation should be key. Using all of the head lights at once would be a drain on the batteries and cause problems later. Plus too much light in a small space is going to hurt them while trying to see in darker areas. Like too much light overstimulated the eyes making it harder to see, pros and cons for both the humans and vampires…

Again prototypes, limited supply, bring in the question are these the type of vamps that the stake needs to stay in to remain dead or can the stake be removed and the vamp stay down? This is a major plot point and problems with using an open all=source type of mythos.

Hannah is going to seriously question how a vampire with telepathy can know five vampires were dead? Really? She was one who knew all about them and brought them over. I’m having issues!

If the nova is a super bright light, as written, one should be enough to hold back vamps in the small space of subway tunnels…no need to waste all four at once.

Overall, funny and interesting (even if my nitpicking made it seem worse than it is), but a lot of plot holes. There is a lot of tweaking that could be done to make it better…or I’m just a crazy person who over thinks things.

Published by Courtney M. Wendleton

I'm an author with an associate's in psychology. Interested in a lot of different things, and love controversy. The more controversial the better, but that's not all I'm interested in. Can be a bit confusing at times, but that's normal!

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